got into Drexel, took the GRE, and so on and so forth

maybe “relief” is the word i’m looking for? more like burnt the fuck out. why does it seem like i’m the only person on campus who just has too much shit on her plate academically? i feel like i learned four years too late that all these nights spent inside writing papers are going to get me no further than everyone who doesn’t do the same, and now i have two to three more years ahead of me. relief and regret are becoming uncomfortably interchangeable.

"with mother finally *****, and the last fantastic book flung out of the tenement window, and the last door closed at 4 A.M. and the last telephone slammed at the wall in reply and the last furnished room emptied down to the last piece of mental furniture, a yellow paper rose twisted on a wire hanger on the closet, and even that imaginary, nothing but a hopeful little bit of hallucination—"
-allen ginsberg, "Howl"

this is mostly shit that has to do with words/literature/me complaining as eloquently as possible. i don't really take myself seriously as a blogger [yet] though, so don't expect those to be the limits.

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